Thursday, November 16, 2006

Sale! Sale! Sale!!

Robert Frost once remarked "The brain is a wonderful organ. It starts working the moment you get up in the morning and does not stop until you get into the office." How very true! It just stops. The brain, I mean. I understand that you need to nourish and nurture your brain and it can become a wonderful slave. Well, MY brain is hopeless. I nourish it with 4 cups of coffee and 2 cups of tea daily, but still it won't function. Not the way it is supposed to at least. Forget becoming a slave, I can swear, it is becoming more of a liability with each passing day! Wish there was a way I could get rid of it. Any takers?!? :-)

I can list down all the features which might just want you to have my brain. If not you, your friend maybe. Or maybe you can gift it to your enemy and I can promise, he will loose all capacity to conspire against you.

1. It has not been used much
Yes. I have kept it safe from any kind of wear and tear. Even after seeing 25 winters and 24 summers, my brain has all the capabilities it had when I was born. Nothing has changed much and it looks brand new. It has all the innocence of a child, ahem, and is innocuous. It just cannot think of anything that would make you want to do anything wrong. Infact, you would never ever Do Anything.

2. Mera dimag comupter se bhi tez chalta hai
I am not a Chacha Chaudhari silly. Like any good salesperson, I am promising more and delivering far less. What I actually mean is Mera dimag mere computer se tez chalta hai. You see, my office computer is full of trash. Of the 40 Gb space I have, about 12 Gb is project related stuff. Even though I never get much opportunity to use it, I can't delete it. The remaining space is loaded with stuff that I have copied from my mobile; at least 5-6 Gb of songs, useless downloads from the internet and what not. The result is that, it has become so slow, that it sure would win the world slow cycling championship. And my peanut sized brain can do 2 + 2 faster than my computer. Ha! My computer would not be able to start the calculator in that time!!

3. It is maintenance free!
I promise, you wont have to spend another penny on newspapers, novels, books, jokes, smses.. It understands nothing. :-) They say, Kala Akshar Bhains Barabar. And you try bringing these things close to my brain and it would start hallucinating buffalos all around. You would automatically stay away from these things and I bet you would be saving a lot of hard earned money!

4. Forget the price!*
Well, it is free of cost if you have been a regular reader of my blog. :-) This is the only way I can show my gratitude! You take it, and I promise never to write again. If you are new, still no worries. You read all the posts, comment on each and every one of it and voila! You can have a claim too.

Disclaimer: The brain will be given as a whole. Because of the small size it won't be possible for me to divide it. :-|

* Conditions apply.